Tres Marias in College

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 I was overwhelmed how College is very past faced. Imagine, you’ll take subjects like Organic Chemistry in a short period of a semester. In High School you take it for a whole school year and the vast time is still not enought for you to master everything.

Being a student studying a pre-med course, I was very lucky to have all passing scores in almost every subject. I can tell it is a very good start for a freshmen like me. I did well like how I did in my High School. I am not saying it’s easy. It is really very difficult because your subjects need your 100% attention. I can say it’s almost the same as High School. If you want to pass, you simply study. What makes college different is that it’s the determiner of my future. Our future. Why does it sounds so serious?

Today I went home late because of our Chemistry tutorial. I grabbed the chance since it’s free and I’m really enjoying taking Science subjects. While listening to the discussion, my mind bothered me with one question.

 “Am I really in the right place?”

I always asked myself that question. Based on the situation, I was in the right place since my announced dream is to be a doctor.  Of all pre-med courses I took BS Psychology because it’s the only course that appealed to me the most. Another factor in choosing Psychology is that I am fond of interacting with people. I don’t make a bunch of friends but I know how to adjust and “ride” with other people’s interests and personality. Before going home, I am with people I never knew had the same problems like me.

 

                First is my smart friend who asked us to eat at a fastfood. I didn’t decline since it was a perfect time for bonding before our Prelims. I knew she was a Math enthusiast like me(I love Math :D) and being a valedictorian made her a scholar of our school. She said she really wanted to be an engineer. I myself being a math enthusiast understands her. I’m missing the hard core Math I’m used to do in my High School days. I noticed how she did well in our College Algebra subject while her other scores are not so okay. She feels really pressured since being a scholar requires a high maintaining grade.

 

                My new friend who is also with us told us that she’s really undecided yet. No, she’s already decided it’s only that she felt like she is not ready to face College yet. I asked her a lot of times if she likes our course, she said yes. I think she really does. Well, adjusting is really not that easy.

 

The three of us were surprised not knowing we share almost the same problems all this time.

 

                And lastly – me. I love my course, I love Psychology. Actually I have no big problem except that another passion that keeps on bothering me. I love writing like how I love Psychology. I dream of becoming a “real” writer someday. I don’t know why do I have this crazy dream. I was thinking of self-studying creative writing. Weirdo huh?

 I hope to learn writing through reading articles, attending seminars and practicing my writing skills in school activities while pursuing my bachelor’s degree. I also took blogging seriously as a baby step to my literary dream. I’m dreaming of the almost impossible since engaging in the publishing industry has a lot of competition. It’s like engaging in a battle where I have no firearms since I’ll be battling with people who are equipped with knowledge and talent. I don’t even know if I have any one of those. What I know is that I have passion. Passion that brings me to  confusion because my passion is divided into two things. It’s like a torn-between-two-lovers thing. I’m torned between my childhood dream and my present dream. Hoho. I’m starting to think now that I’m really weird.

                I’m thinking of giving up Psychology and taking up a BA course related to writing. When I think of doing it, I feel like I can’t. Seriously, leaving Psychology won’t be easy for me because it took me a lot of efforts and patience to be where I am today. After all, I’m slowly approaching my doctor dream…Oh God. Help me. I mean help us.